Pastry week.
Bye bye: Sweet sweet Alvin, who needed perfect vol-au-vents to survive, but didn't quite hit the mark. Somewhat unexpectedly, Alvin's father is a retired Filipino army general.
Lucky escape: Nadiya, who had to offer up unfilled volz, as Mel would no doubt abbreviate them. Though I think there's something to be said for self-scooping delicious filling into your own pastry cases. Paul certainly loaded his up.
Ma Baker: Mat, whom Mary Berry clearly fancies; she double-punched him in the stomach as congratulations - a classic move from the Primary School Book of Flirtation. Her seduction chat might need work though - not sure mentioning that his perfect egg yolk was so good "it dripped down my hand" was quite the right angle.
Smutwatch: Alvin arranged his plums nicely but they were sadly undercooked.
And the first soggy bottom goes to...: Nadiya! Cross it off your bingo sheets everyone.
Top Two Sandwiches: Like all good hipsters, Tamal loves pulled pork, but what was his other bestest sarnie?!? (For the record, mine are the 800 calorie ham and brie baguette from EAT and the 'Rubenesque', a sourdough, pastrami and cheese triumph from my local caff, the Archie Parker - which is excitingly run by Mrs Simon from Trev and Simon.)
Flaouna: a) a celebrity baby name, b) this summer's hottest dance craze or c) a Cypriot pasty.
Next time: Bakes of the past. Cue many a joke about Mary's age.
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