Basic construction week
Another year, another trip to an impeccably cool London warehouse full of fabric and bobbins. Another fine-seeming bunch of contestants too, though no Buddhist prison chaplain #sadtimes
New judge: May has been silently replaced with Edna Mode, AKA Esme Young, film costumer and designer for Cher (FOR CHER!). May was a sweetheart, but I’ve already completely taken to Esme (SHE DRESSED CHER!). She especially made her mark this week by talking arse; complimenting a particularly fine buttock-showcasing skirt, and making the model totes blush.
Sew long, farewell: Scottish Duncan (he of the Vanilla-Ice-and-then-some hairspray quiff) didn’t quite make the grade, so was first to leave the haberdashery – with the usual lonely walk and ceremonial switching off of the lights. Tracey was the lucky survivor, which means her husband will definitely have to go to Tesco’s to get his own dinner next week – am sure he’ll survive.
The Pattern Task: A top cut on the bias, which I think means ‘making things all diagonal-ish’. It was all about matchy matchy lines – a problem for Ghislaine, who initially went for blurry blurry lines (obviously not in a Robin Thicke rapey way, of course). Stay at home dad Jamie won out over science editor Charlotte - perhaps because she spent most of her time very sweetly helping footballer Josh. Charlotte is probably my early favourite as she wants to replace her three children's bedrooms with the haberdashery and made pyjamas for them which listed their place in the family pecking order. #parentalrolemodel
The Alteration Task: We’re used to May wow-ing in wonder at the alterations, but there’s a new attitude in town now - open disappointment at the mundane. To be fair, it wasn’t super impressive to see pretty much every blue maternity smock turned into a skirt – no wonder Jamie made it two for two, with a slightly crazed de-constructed dress, even though - hushed tones - it looked a hot mess to me...
(Can I suggest a maternity clothes week though – there is *significant* scope for more preggers fashion.)
The Sew-stopper Task: Made to measure skirts – and a great selection, thanks very much. Lots of swishy catwalk potential from the models, apart from the aforementioned bum-tastic pencil one. I was expecting it to get the whit-whoo sexy background music, but I guess they must be saving that for bra and stockings week.
Garment Of The Week: The bum skirt, of course! It was all about that bass, about that bass, no treble (etc). So well done Northern Irish Angeline.
RIP: The programme was dedicated to last year's finalist Lorna Monje (and, for the very very little it’s worth, so is this blog). Lorna was a friend’s aunt and, for me, a Great British All-Time Favourite. She was, by all accounts, a wonderful person – which was so evident from what we saw from her on the show. Thanks for being such a warm, smart and funny piece of my TV life, Lorna. Her family have set up a JustGiving page here.
